Carpundit

What's Annoying About the Movies?

We took in Shrek the Third over the weekend, along with everyone else in rainy New England.  We went early, for the morning matinee.  It was expensive anyway.  Then we got to sit through advertising for junk no one should feed their kids.  After that, we got to sit through previews for other films they want us to pay too much to see, most of which appear not to be worth even a reasonable admission price.  [Prediction: Seinfeld's bee movie will turn out to be a C movie.]

And what's with showing a preview for a movie with machine guns, missiles, and invading robots before a kids' film?  And who thinks it's a good idea to show a preview with Queen Latifah making racial jokes to an audience of five-year-olds?

And why to do media outlets lead with the weekend take as if it were a sporting contest?   When did the box office take become of concern to anyone outside the industry?  Oh, and could we stop the stupid headlines on that topic ("Big Green Ogre Stomps Spidey")?

American culture isn't merely declining; it's dead.

James Bond Can't Drive, Either

My lovely wife bought me a DVD of Casino Royale as a late birthday present.  Not knowing much about electronics, she bought the full screen version instead of the wide screen.  If you have a decent modern TV of a fair size, you'll want to skip the full screen version.  Everyone looks slightly short and a bit fat.  "Squat" is a good word.  But that's not my point.

I didn't notice when I saw it in the theater -one of only two films I saw in theater last year, because I hate movie theaters and their prices and their f***ing Buick commercials- but the movie has no respect for cars.  They rolled an Aston DBS, for God's sake.  C'mon, he's James Bond.  You'd think they'd let him keep it wheels down.

Great Bond, though.  Hope he's back soon.

A Good Car Chase Scene or Two

John Daley has an eye for movie car chases; his ranking.  Mine.

The Bad Car Chase Scene I Watched Last Night

Last night, I felt like watching an action movie - something with some driving in it, preferably.  My choices were Le Mans and The Bourne Supremacy, both of which I'd recently picked up at Borders for short money.  (I also picked up Pride and Prejudice and The Wedding Singer -was that 1998 already?- but not much action in either one, I'm guessing.)  I went with Bourne, partly because the box says it has a "stunning high-speed chase sequence."  It doesn't.

Little Miss Sunshine

Based on the reviews and on the fact that I, who eschews movies, want to see it, I predict it's the next Blair Witch Project.

Carpundit Cars Review

Well, my five-year-old dragged me off to see the movie Cars, on its opening weekend, in violation of my inviolable rule against seeing any movie on its opening weekend.  If you love cars, or you love cartoons, or you love sitting in a theater full of antsy children, you should see it.  Aside from almost falling asleep in the middle -which I would have accomplished if the seats at the Wellfleet Cinemas weren't less comfortable than those at Fenway Park- I rather enjoyed it.  (More of the review of the movie Cars after the jump; possible spoilers, depending on your definition of spoiler and on whether a movie this simple could ever be spoiled.  If you don't know how it's going to turn out, you did fall asleep in the middle.)

On the Da Vinci Code Movie, part II

My (online) friend Joe, the Ford Guy, makes so much sense in comments that I wanted to republish his common-sense take:

So many people get their panties in a twist without really thinking these things out. If Jesus married and fathered children, it wouldn't make him any less divine... If you have faith, no book or movie will destroy it. It's much ado about nothing.

On The Da Vinci Code

Note to Catholics: The Da Vinci Code is a novel.  If Ray Flynn can comprehend that subtle point, so can you.  By the way, I know several Catholics who loved the book.  The movie looks to be a dud.

Note to Don Imus: putting on the President of the Catholic League, the execrable William Donahue with the introduction, "I love this guy," is beneath even you and your sycophantic amorphousness.  I'd rather listen to Bo Dietl, and he ought to be in prison.

Note to Ron Howard: thanks for handing the nutjobs a victory, Opie.

Do Only the Minis Survive?

I borrowed The Italian Job on DVD from another car fiend.  No, not that one; this one.  I'm halfway through (with little kids around, movies are often watched in parts) and they've already wrecked one of these, and one of these, and one of these, and one of these.

Can it possibly get any worse?

Reese Witherspoon Wins!

Here's one Boston Herald cover I can endorse.

I'm sure my endorsement had no small thing to do with it.